Forget it!

Well Spring Break is now at an end.  I didn't get to blog everyday.  I either wasn't near a computer or was just toooo busy.  I'm gonna say something that is gonna stop the world- Spring Break wasn't long enough.  It flew by wayy too fast.

Sooo where was I?? Oh yeah- Wednesday. 

YOU KNOW WHAT- FORGET IT!

My mind is way tooo preoccupied to how I'm feeling right now.  I'm ready to give up on everything.  I have been in school for 3 years and it has gotten me NOWHERE!  Except for thousands of dollars in loans.  I started out as a Art major.  But they changed when I could barely make it through one drawing class-  You need like 3.  And what was the point of an art degree?  You either have to be amazing at it to make money or teach it.  AND I DON'T EVER WANT TO BE A TEACHER.  That's where 2 of my years went.
So I thought around and decided on Radiological Sciences.  You know like X-ray or Ultrasound.  I wanted to do pre-natal ultrasounds.  But why?  Cause i like babies....  Soooo do you actually do anything with babies? NO!  And do you know how much science AND math you need?  Pre-calulus, Physics, etc...    I can't do anything of that.  I suck at science and I hate math.
And where does that put me?  NOWHERE!  I don't wanna teach.  I suck at history and science.  And nothing else really interests me. 
Why get a degree- just to have one?  Why get thousands of more dollars in debt?  I don't even want a career.  All I really want is to have a family.  I want to be a soccer mom.  I want to have babies and a husband.  I want to have a clean house and do lots of laundry.  I want to drop my kids off at school and then take them to football practice.  I want to have dinner ready for my husband.  I want to be happy, in love, and with a family to take care of.
But No!  As a twenty-something year old, you're expected to be in college.  To be working towards a degree and career.  You need a job!  You NEED a degree!  Do I REALLY?  WHY?!
 I almost cried in French class today cause of alll this.  And I'm getting white hairs.  And I want comfort foods-  fries and fries!  This stressees me outtt! 
So I'm trying to decide what I want.  I don't think I'm going back to school next semester.  I have no drive or ambitions.  I can't do work without a purpose behind it. I don't do things to make someone else happy.  I do it for me. 
I'm working buttt......I need a new job. 
People think I just have it oh so easy.  Just a host. You just sit on your ass and answer phones.  Walk in the park.  Not here.  I would have to say we are one of the strictest restaurants you can work for.  And also one that gets the rudest people- who expect WAY too much.  We are not perfect- we are mostly college age kids just trying to make it through life on our own.  We make mistakes.  Guess what?  We get in a car accident, have a death in the family, ourselves sick, or our hearts broken to pieces- WE STILL HAVE TO PUT A FAKE SMILE ON OUR FACES AND COME TO WORK AND KISS YOUR ASS(BUTT- IF MY MOTHER IS READING).  And oh poor little you who can't find a place to park or have to walk to get here- SO DO I!  I usually have to park blocks and blocks away and walk.  And I usually have to pay each time.  And when I can't find one I take a chance of getting a ticket-  I have had many tickets just cause I had no choice.  And if I have to try to explain to another IDIOT tourist how to drive around a freaking square I might just kill jump of the building.  You see the road continuing on the other side- NOW FOLLOW THE ROAD AROUND TO IT!  Or here's a better idea- just drive through the square, run over a few people, and get arrested so I don't have to waste my time on you! 
The customer is NOT always right- there are limits.  Like loosing my job.  Sorry- but i am NOT gonna break the rules and put my neck on the line just for you and your 80 year old grandmother, or 12 year old daughter, or your boss, or for you jerk who calls and cusses me out, hangs up and then asks for a manager when you come by in person.  And how bout you stop lying and using my name when you come- saying I got you a reservation or said you could get right in.  Do you not think we will remember you?  Or that as hosts we communicate with each other?  AND OPEN UP YOUR FREAKING EARS! ITS K-O-R-Y!  NOT TORY, CARRIE, CORRINE, DORRINE, LORI!
I am seriously gonna kill a tourist soon.  I just want one to cross the line so I can have a legit reason to let out my 3 years of getting cussed out, yelled at, being used, and being told depressing stories.  I go in feeling fine- but then by the end I have a killer headache!  Why do people have to be sooo mean and rude to young college age women over getting into a restaurant?  People cross the line way too often!  There have been times when I have felt unsafe- with a much larger man in my face yelling at me (a young woman just doing my job).    It's not my fault- I didn't make the rules- AND IT'S JUST A FREAKING RESTAURANT!  Go to Kroger- Buy a fried chicken- and EAT YOUR FREAKING HEART OUT! 

Yes I know I should be glad I have a job.  And that I do get paid very well for what I do.  But a lot of the times it just isn't worth the abuse.  So yes- I am still grateful for a job-side note- This is nothing to do with Paula or the Deens or Management.  Just the idiots who come and don't get how or why we run the way we do.  At least we do get people who are really nice, funny, and make jokes with you.  And sometimes will tip you in the bathroom when you give them directions to the mall.

- on a side note-  I feel like giving up blogging already.  Why?  CAUSE EVERYONE BLOGS NOW!  No one wants to read about my stupid life.